Fear as a Spiritual Path
Fear sometimes sounds so rationale that it can be seductive. “If you leave your job to start a business, write your book, or__________ (fill in the blank) how will you pay your bills?” You hear multiple voices; the voices of your parents, well intentioned friends or your partner, and you start to question your wisdom even though you really know you need to make a change.
Other times the voice of fear can be hilarious and even irrational: It’s the holidays and you decide to have something you love, a piece of pumpkin cheesecake from Cyrus O’Leary’s. Fear says, “Are you sure you should, what if you want more and then can’t stop eating?” Then another voice says, “You have enough willpower, go ahead and enjoy it.” So you take your first bite of the cheesecake and then another, louder voice says, “I wouldn’t have done that if I were you, now you’ll want another piece.” And we listen to these voices and sometimes make important decisions based on them! Theses are the endless and random thoughts that swirl through our minds….
Fear can also be your friend, as many of you reading this know. It tells you where you still need to grow to be more loving and compassionate to yourself and others. This is the spiritual path as I see it; to return to that place of unconditional love.
Just Tune Inward
You may know what I’m going to say next- it’s not original and yet it needs to be repeated: Listen to your own, still, small voice. Often answers come that just “feel right” when tuning in. This voice will not be fear based but more like a loving friend. Listen to this voice.
A daily practice to quiet the mind is always advisable. I don’t always succeed-sometimes the voices are just too loud. And it does take some practice. If you are a beginner, the voices will generally get louder at first. I use methods that follow my thoughts-I do not attempt to ignore them as they are often too loud. I see these voices as words on a large blackboard and then take a giant eraser to them-often the blackboard fills up again and I keep using this method until by mind begins to “quiet down.” Many choose not to get quiet because those loud voices can say horrible things, which can be overwhelming. If your attempts to meditate have been mostly frustrating, here are some other methods you might try:
- Listen to inspirational music and just close your eyes for 10 minutes focusing on the music
- Read a daily meditation/inspirational quote and hold that message in your mind
- Repeat a mantra or phrase that has meaning to you and uplifts you
- Dance to some music that makes you feel great and then sit quietly and just breathe
- Listen to a relaxation/meditation tape
- Do a free writing exercise for 10 minutes where you just write whatever comes out without editing and then close your eyes and breathe deeply
- Take a class where you learn how to meditate
- Make up your own ritual which feels right to you
The point is to find something that works for you and keep doing it 3-5 times a week (daily is best) It does not need to take an hour-centering can happen using the above techniques after 5-10 minutes.
(NOTE: If you are experiencing deep seated problems, depression, anxiety, etc., then you may require the support of a trained professional such as a psychotherapist or healer. Meditation and self discovery are not meant as substitutes in these instances.)
What About Asking Others for Input?
Here is a powerful question to ask yourself: Is this friend of family member living their life with passion and vision which would make them trustworthy, or, are they playing small? If I don’t want to have a life like theirs, then I know that their message is fear based and I stop listening. If they have lived larger by taking risks and following their heart, then I will listen, yet, ultimately each of us must come to our own conclusions and decide what voice we choose to listen to.
You have a choice. You may decide to welcome your many voices by "tuning inward", allowing yourself to explore compassionately. You may also choose to ignore these voices and continue on your current path. How wonderful that you get to decide! May the voices you listen to inspire you to live a larger life, one with passion, purpose and love. Namaste….